Am I supposed to be mad or laugh?

Anyone that has children or raises other people's children knows that there are many many obstacles to overcome in trying to teach these kids what's right and what's wrong amongst the 5 gazillion other things we need to instill in them. Today, Danny taught me again that it is hard to lecture, nag, and/or discipline when what he does is probably the same thing I would do....as an adult.

Case in point: As we were trying to get out of the Safeway parking lot, some idiot in front of me decided that he wanted to turn left onto Fremont Blvd. Fremont Blvd. is a very busy intersection. You'd be lucky if you can even go right out of this particular driveway. So he had at least 6 cars plus the Burger King drive thru backed up while we all waited for him to get his stupid ass out of the way. Some other dumb ass starts honking his horn behind me as if that will solve the world's problems. Finally there's a brief moment where he can gun it and make it across. I move out to the right and get into the far left turning lane (it makes sense if you've seen the intersection) and the honking guy pulls up next to me in the outside turning lane.

And he's staring at me. Like I'm the one that caused everyone to sit and wait. Now typically, I'd yell out the window and tell him to fuck off and what not. But this guy was just strange. He held eye contact with me for like 6 seconds and it creeped me out. So I looked away.

Danny is sitting in the passenger's seat and hears me mumble to myself what a fucking freak show this guy is.

So we're sitting at the light for what seems to be an eternity. If you know me, you know that I most likely have a mild case of ADD. We sat there for so long, that I'm not kidding you, I forgot about the freak staring me down. Then....

"HEY!"

I look over and freak show is talking to me.

"WHAT?" WTF does this jerk off want?

"You better look at your kid and tell him to get his hand in the car."

I look at him like he's out of his mind. Don't tell me what to do with my kid. Then my mind starts thinking about what I'd do if I was a kid and some honking freak show was staring at my mom. So I say:

"What are you talking about? What did he do?"

"He's flipping me off."

Now...as a parent..how do I handle this? Do I have five Danny because that's really what I want to do? Do I tell him that freak show might have a gun and it's not cool to flip off people? You have to know who's the right candidate after all...

So I tell Danny loudly (so that freak show hears), "Keep your hands in the car. You can't flip off people, they might be FUCKING CRAZY."

And I really try so hard not to smile or laugh while telling Danny this. I did pretty good. But now poor Danny probably thinks I was mad at him. I just can't tell him that it was funny because then he'll do it all the time. Ha..like he doesn't do it now.

your hair is too long

My son is on this whole kick of growing his hair out. Why? I still am trying to figure this one out. Maybe to grow it out and cut it for Locks of Love? No. Maybe to keep his head warm since we live in such a cold climate? Oh, that's right. We live in the Bay Area; therefore there is no weather deemed cold enough to require long hair on an 11 year old boy.

I've been asking Danny just about every day for the past 2 months if today would be the day we'd go get his hair cut. And every day he says no.

OK. I get it. I know that kids are growing out their hair now. It's the style. I'm not exactly sure why being that little boys all over Fremont are starting to look like dirty little girls. It makes me wonder if they don't bother to look in mirrors. Who exactly thinks it looks good?

And the thing with Danny's hair is that he's got bad hair. It grows at different rates so it's different lengths. This is why he needs to keep it short because then at least it can be maintained. He has a cowlick from hell right where Dennis the Menace does.

So last Wednesday or Thursday morning, I get up in the morning and you know...the morning ritual. Pee, get in the shower, blah blah blah. Then I look in the bathroom garbage can and see this lock of hair. I know right away that it's Danny's. I kinda chuckle to myself and forget about it. But I was telling my friend Sami about it and said, "How funny would it be if it's that one piece that always stands up on the top of his head?"

The next morning, I asked Danny about the hair in the bathroom garbage can. He told me this one piece was driving him crazy and he pointed to the top of his head. And wouldn't you know, that it was the cowlick! But. Here's the kicker.

Not only did he cut off a lock of hair on the top of his head. But he did it in a way that when looking at his head, you can't even tell. I'd like to know how he did that and I find myself wondering if maybe that's going to be his hidden talent. Maybe I should have him cut my hair.

In the beginning

In the beginning of my time, there was no internet. Hell, I don't even think there were home computers. But I remember being fascinated with computers come 2nd or 3rd grade and playing Oregon Trail on a black screen with everything in green on a floppy disc that was bigger than my hands.

Now I simply cannot function without a computer. I am a MySpace addict. I need to check my email excessively, I'm working on my AA online, all my music is online, I need a computer to do my job...the list goes on and on.

So this morning, my best friend informs me, and the rest of MySpace that she created a blog here and kinda sorta made me do it too. She didn't threaten my life or anything, but I always have to do what she does. So fine. Here's my blog Danielle.

As for the rest of you who don't know me, let me give you some background. The first being (and probably most important in the blogosphere) is that I'm a good writer in the sense that I use proper grammar and punctuation. I don't however do well with paragraphs or any other type of formatting one might expect. So if you can get past that, we're all good. Back to me. I'm 30 friggin' years old. I'm still learning to deal with it as it's all new to me. About 23 days new to me to be exact. I have an 11 year old son. Still getting used to that too. Who tells kids to grow up so fast? I have a boyfriend James who I've been with for about 4 1/2 years, give or take a few months. We live in the SF Bay Area. I have lived what seems to be just about half of everywhere in the United States. Born in Portland, OR. Raised mostly in the Bay, although I've lived in Utah, Minnesota, Texas, Florida, Oregon...and I really feel like I'm missing something in between. I went to more schools than I can remember. My parents were kinda sorta hippy gypsy type people with some illegal activities involved. So yeah...definitely hippy gypsies. I lived with various family members growing up as a result of my parents lack of respect for responsibility. All of these things have made me into the person I am today. Not many people grew up the way I did and I honest to God don't think I'd change it if I could. I've learned what people are all about and how stuff works.

I often find myself rambling in my mind and just thinking about one thing that leads me to the next and the next. Last week, I was out back of the warehouse where I work and saw a crane standing in the water/sewer run off that I hope doesn't lead into the Bay although I'm pretty sure it does. Anyway, this stork was just standing there in the water looking down. I'm guessing he was fishing. So there I was, on my cell phone talking about nothing in particular and wondering if this crane was fishing. Or maybe he was cooling off. Or playing. Who knows.

But this got me to thinking. Do animals, fish, reptiles, blah blah blah do everything with a purpose? Think about it this way. We buy HD TVs, video game consoles, expensive computers, alcohol, cigarettes, hookahs, drugs, books...anything that is someone's vice. And aside from the entertainment factor, what is the point? That crane has it easy. All he does is look for food to eat, find a mate to reproduce, and sleep. He doesn't worry about getting the latest iPhone, the latest UFC pay per view, or car insurance. Life in it's simplest form.

So that got me to thinking. Do you think that all animals are homeless? Or do they have a dedicated spot in the bush that is theirs and theirs alone. Do you think the crane (let's name him Joe) gets pissed if Sally Squirrel's kid, Albert* goes into Joe's little spot in the bush looking for food?

Do you think Joe and Sally Squirrel worry about where their next meals are coming from? Or do you suppose that they are so confident in their survival skills that they don't even worry about that? And if Joe really was fishing in that run off...what about the fish? Do you think that the fish he could have caught has family like Finding Nemo? I wonder if it's like a horrible thing to happen to a fish family. Can you imagine your sister just being picked up and eaten right in front of you? Do you think that fish swim around the lakes, rivers, and oceans with or without a purpose? I think about shit like that. Do fish only stay in one part of the river because that's where their home is? Or do they just swim endlessly in search of food? And is it true that fish never sleep? If so, what a horrible existence. But if they do sleep, I'm pretty sure they don't lay down.

Until next time....

Oh, and * refers to Albert. The true story of a snotty nosed kid in Ohio. Read about him and Cliff here.